It translates to “you have Play-Doh on your forehead”.

I haven’t really eaten fast food in years, but a few months ago I was sort of forced to get lunch at a Burger King because it was the only place around. It (a Whopper and onion rings) was actually pretty tasty, a lot better than what I was expecting. But I just felt so physically bad after eating it, like I just wanted to lay down somewhere and die. Maybe it was all the salt, I dunno. When you combine this with the insane prices, it’s a just a mystery why anyone would eat this shit regularly.

It is so demoralizing to try and explain civil asset forfeiture. I’ve never had a single person believe that it’s real when I tell them about it - everybody insists that it can’t possibly be true since it’s so flagrantly unconstitutional.

I know some very smart people from Iowa. They left.

My favorite is “{country} furious”.

At least he would never wear a white Batman costume. Maybe.

Or alternatively, it’s called “we were all fired by some obnoxious teenagers”.

Time to pull yourselves up by your bootstraps.

Bill Gates is rich enough to have other people work out for him.

I don’t buy this explanation for one second.

Why would the demands have even been written up in the first place if they hadn’t intended to send them?

Why has no one organized cyber warfare against your regime?

I mean … the US government (the NSA specifically) can basically read anybody’s electronic communications and let themselves into any networked device younger than 25 years old. If there were to be any kind of successful resistance to this administration, it couldn’t be “cyber” in any way.

When you make an assumption, you make an ass out of u and mption.

Right tool for the right job.

When the 2nd Amendment was written, a bunch of (trained) dudes with muskets represented the pinnacle of military power (at least if there wasn’t any artillery around, even back then). So the 2nd Amendment gave the people the right to possess sufficient military power to counter the federal government. Today, having a closet full of peashooters means absolutely fucking nothing to a government with armored vehicles, tanks, helicopters, airplanes, cruise missiles, drones, intercontinental missiles and nukes at their disposal. The idea that the 2nd Amendment represents an antidote to a tyrannical federal government is just as much of a fantasy for the Left as it always has been for the Right.

Better or worse than rape-via-twitter? Better, I guess.