Creator of LULs (a script which helps links to point to your instance)

Come say hi here or over at https://twitch.tv/AzzuriteTV :) I like getting to know more people :)

Play games with me: https://steamcommunity.com/id/azzu

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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: June 29th, 2023

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  • Dating requires incredible mental resilience. People are traumatized. People are selfish. People are rude. People are struggling. You will have to be able to deal with all kinds of unpleasant behaviors.

    Most of the time, these unpleasant behavior have literally nothing to do with you, because people are just self-centered, the hero of their own story, not seeing others as truly equal, putting you into neat little boxes you don’t really fit in, or so many other reasons.

    Even if you’re the most perfect person in the world, literally the most attractive, literally with perfect people skills, you’d miss out on at least 70% of connections just because of the random shortcomings of the other person or tertiary events. So you have to be able to deal with the fact that most interactions will not work out.

    But for your and everyone’s psyche, every failure is a blow to the ego. So you will always get more blows to your ego than getting it stroked with a success. So it’s completely natural to feel like you do, that there’s an issue with you. But it’s just simply not true.

    The only way to do this dating thing is do it exactly as much as you can handle another rejection. Optimally, you’ll be so comfortable by yourself that you literally don’t care about rejection, because you’re so comfortable already anyway, so why should a rejection matter? You’d just return to being comfortable alone.


  • I mean, meh. I never would’ve gotten together with people if I hadn’t just followed whatever they were comfortable with. I wrote for like 3 weeks about the deepest shit before I met up with someone, still together with that person. With others, I do exchange 3 messages and then meet up.

    It’s more about genuinely being interested in the other person, getting them out of their “shell”, i.e. talking about what they truly want, by being truly open yourself. So in a sense what you say is true though, if you wanna meet, you should tell them you wanna meet.

    I’ve also been successful re-establishing “ghosted” connections just by saying what I feel like “huh I thought we had a good connection here, apparently I misjudged that, anyway, hope you have a good one :)”

    Of course there’ll be many where you’re just too different to build a connection, too incompatible, or just too much unrelated shit getting in the way. But there’s just no single script to follow. Except just saying what you want/feel, and truly listening.









  • Naja, wählen gehen ist ja auch sinnfrei, ne, weil eine Stimme ist ja irrelevant.

    Ist einfach ne Ausrede halt. Klar hat der einzelne “keinen” Effekt. Aber wenn alle denken sie haben keinen Effekt, und deswegen ihren Konsum nicht beschränken und so effektiv 30% mehr Treibhausgase produzieren, dann steigen die Treibhausgase um 30%.

    Alles in unserer Gesellschaft hängt im Endeffekt vom einzelnen ab. Klar haben verschiedene Leute verschieden viel Macht, etwas zu ändern, aber die Politik wird auch vom einzelnen gemacht, Politiker sind auch vom einzelnen gewählt.

    Das Problem ist einfach, dass der durchschnittliche Einzelne scheiße ist.

    Und ja, mir ist bewusst, dass Superreiche noch mehr kontrollieren, aber man könnte ja z.b. Linke wählen oder ähnliches, die wirklich was gegen die machen wollen. Machen auch die wenigsten.





  • Azzu@lemm.eetoBuyFromEU@feddit.orgLemmy at a glance
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    2 months ago

    Pretty much what the other person said. There isn’t really a difference which server you’re on, lemmy.world is fine. But we go on Lemmy because we want a robust network that isn’t prone to central failure like reddit is - if theoretically everyone were on lemmy.world, then the situation really is no different than reddit. Someone could just buy the server/admins and do whatever they want, or the lemmy.world admins could just be evil in the first place.

    For you not to be on lemmy.world is no disadvantage, just make sure whatever server you go to isn’t a walled garden and stopped talking to (“defederated”) lemmy.world, currently the only larger one that does that is beehaw.org.

    Unfortunately (talking about federated services in general) there is a small bit of complexity that comes with spreading around the service across multiple servers. Lemmy tries to hide as much of it as possible from the end user, but it’s impossible to hide the effects completely. It’s kinda like democracy - it only really works well if every voter is informed, but even if they aren’t, it’s still better than an autocracy.